You can borrow my goat

img_0193I have someone in my life who continually tries to bait me into conflict.  I don’t understand this thinking because I will do almost anything to avoid conflict including, but not limited to, hiding under my bed covers. I guess you could say this person is a professional “Goat Getter” or that she might have a degree in “Goat Acquisition and Studies”.  She’s a pro for sure,  but I have a secret weapon.  I have created a mental goat (Gosh it just make so much sense that, given my diagnoses, I’d have a “mental goat”, right?) who just refuses to be gotten. Notice her look of disinterest with her upturned snout and little side-eye going on. If you don’t have a mental goat, you can totally borrow mine.  I will absolutely share her with you.  See how nice I am?  It’s not that I’m selfish with my goat, I would just like to be asked first.  If you do borrow her, you should know her name is Gertrude and she likes cookies and trash (don’t judge her, she’s doing you a favor).

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